GIST Support WikiPersonal Experiences
I read your post and wondered what I do to maintain a positive attitude so that I don't worry and make my cancer the focus of my life. My heart goes out to you because I know how my first reaction to finding out that my gist had returned this past spring controlled my thoughts for the next month.
Then I took a hard look at what I had to live for. I have custody of two beautiful little girls ages 3 1/2 and 4 1/2. I initially felt guilty because they had experienced enough trauma in their lives, and now the one person they could count on had a dreadful disease. I have my own business - a one woman training company, where I book business as much as 2 years in advance. I worried that business I booked would not be fulfilled and that customers who found out I had cancer wouldn't want to do business with me. I was worried that I wouldn't have the energy to maintain my house, etc. etc. etc. I was a mess.
Then, I started to focus on making the most of the day I had. I could make the most of my time with my two little girls. I could create wonderful memories and teach them life lessons that would stay with them all their lives. I could bring in other people to take on training sessions if I was unable to make my commitments. And finally, I could ask for the help that is necessary to keep my life in balance and save my sanity.
When I stopped worrying about the future, each day got better. I feel better, I have more strength and best of all, I don't spend the day worried about my cancer. I just do what is necessary to maintain my health. I take my gleevec and deal with whatever side effect comes along.
I hope this helps a little. It's not as easy as I make it sound, but it is working for me.
Living with cancer is not the worst thing I've had to deal with.